Subject: The Oxford Dictionary's latest definition

orth

The Oxford Dictionary's latest definition of the
following words.

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*Divorce:
*Future tense of marriage*
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Cigarette:
! a# R* h# i4 q/ L  T*A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire
at one end and a fool on the other. *
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Lecture:
*An art of transferring information from the
/ S- Z  }3 Q7 N( Z: f5 N5 Pnotes of the lecturer to the notes of the
students without passing through the minds
. @8 S+ b- g  m, f9 Y7 f# R1 s) pof either.*
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0 `  {0 |  g2 P# o# dCompromise:
*The art of dividing a cake in such a way that
& U$ {* \+ v( h- l/ r4 e, ieverybody believes he got the biggest piece.*

* T0 [, J6 i8 r  GTears:
/ `( g/ W% v8 |9 k  l' T*The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power
is defeated by feminine water power.*
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Dictionary:
*A place where success comes before work.*

Conference Room:
*A place where everybody talks, nobody listens
and everybody disagrees later on.*


& W; o2 [! Q7 F- ^5 i: j: [Classic:
/ \8 V5 ?$ U: t  F( r+ l*A book which people praise, but do not read.*
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Smile:
*A curve that can set a lot of things straight.*
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# N6 |+ P, s/ k/ i5 P4 p8 O" K0 COffice:
*A place where you can relax after your strenuous home
life.*

Yawn:
*The only time some married men ever get to open their
. X/ h0 b9 m% ^8 J2 @, m( Bmouth.*


Etc:
*A sign to make others believe that you know more than
) X9 W* k0 f+ D* Uyou actually do.*


5 f4 o! n3 Y2 mCommittee:
# x- [9 M# e# |- w1 W1 F" k*Individuals who can do nothing individually and
sit to decide that nothing can be done together.*

Experience:
*The name men give to their mistakes.*
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; S$ g2 N( h. r- O9 EAtom Bomb:
% H0 S3 z9 X7 o5 ^/ }% k*An invention to end all inventions.*

Philosopher:
$ O. Y: S( _5 o1 _' `- c*A fool who torments himself during life, to be
2 I" F- [8 D, @spoken of when dead.*


. z5 C2 w) T" UDiplomat:
*A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way
that you actually look forward to the trip.*
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Opportunist:
*A person who starts taking a bath if he accidentally
" z# j2 h% Q! P- F' ufalls into a river.*
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Optimist:
5 M% p* K) `3 L' g*A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in
  }- k* a4 {2 t+ \2 zmidway 'See I am not injured yet!!' *
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Miser:
*A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.*

) @. `' y4 ^& m! I5 x  A: MFather:
*A banker provided by nature.*
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; G  V, W* q5 S+ K$ rCriminal:
1 ~. f# Z5 [) ^, g( a/ w0 P9 ?* r! b; a*A guy no different from the rest...except that he got
4 B- N  ]' W! h9 K! ~caught.*
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Politician:
*One who shakes your hand before elections and your
5 p5 s& @% L/ N9 Nconfidence after.*
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Doctor:
*A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills
you with his bills.*
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- a/ _" B7 [1 B$ U% A) [- {Boss:
*Someone who is early when you are late and late
when you are early.*

samsammi

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Arterix

ROTFL!!!!
" `+ S4 J2 m7 q- V6 M. ZI love it, the English humour!
% B! b9 U: \( O) x! w( j4 zSo black!

吉粒粒

:D :D $支持$ $送花$